No. not really, I feel fine actually, but no one ever takes the time to read anyones journal unless it either says "I'm going to kill myself." "I already killed myself." or "I'm in the process of killing myself." Well fuck you, you're reading now, and if you stop now, all you will prove to me is that you were looking forward to me killing myself and when you found out I didn't, you were let down. Assholes.
This is a story about a Joker. Not THE Joker, a Joker. THE joker overdosed or something. It starts at the mall, where most shitty stories start. I walked into an F.Y.E to look at the used games and right when I got in there was a sight to behold, it was the first thing I noticed when I walked into the store.
There he was, a guy who must have been in his late twenties, dressed to a fucking T, like the Heath Ledger Joker. Blotchy face paint, smeared lipstick, purple overcoat, fucking everything. Don't get me wrong, you want a purple overcoat? Fine. You want matching pants? Whatever. But this guy, the way he just stood there, greasy hair, tinted puke green, hanging down to his chin. Purple leather gloves and a distant, sort of look on his face. He looked like he was angry and but he couldn't remember why, like a perplexed sort of anger.
So there he was, buying a "Dark Knight" poster. I had to ask the clerk a question and I kept my distance as I stood behind him. Once he walked out, the clerk made a little quip to me about how he must be so self absorbed, buying a joker poster and all. We both laughed and I soon learned that what I came there for was no longer in stock, so I promptly left.
Only one problem, Joker-guy had been standing at the entrance to the store the whole time and he heard what the clerk said and how we had both laughed. He gave me this little grin that I assume was supposed to be threatening. It was more like an angst ridden smirk than anything. I forgot about him and moved on to the food court.
As I sat there, slowly chewing my Chinese food. I was shocked into sudden awareness as a small, wet projectile bounced off my arm. I look down and see a mustard-soaked French fry, and a small yellow streak on my leather jacket. I turn around to see Joker-guy, grinning his slightly, too convincing grin. I swear, he looked like exactly like that scene in Dark Knight, the one where the joker just sits there in the jail cell, right before he starts clapping his hands.
I tell him that for a Joker he isn't very funny and he responds in a way I didn't, but should have expected. "You remind me of my father...I HATED my father." He did the voice and everything, he even licked his lips. Holy god, what a psycho. I decide to take my poor excuse for Chinese cuisine and move elsewhere.
About ten minutes later I saw security escorting this guy into one of those rooms where they hold shoplifters while they wait for the cops to show up. Ha ha, sucks for Joker-guy, I wonder if they'll give him his "phone call." I sure as fuck hope they don't, just to piss him off.
I went home and did a google search for "joker wannabe." Surprisingly I found a bunch of videos on youtube. "Joker goes to wal-mart.", "Joker goes to the mall.", "Joker pumps gas and gets a dough nut." ,"Joker almost gets beat up." All of these videos are of guys who seem way too old to be doing this and I was surprised none of them got the crap kicked out of them for being nerdy weirdos.
I came to the conclusion that if someone is honestly going to go through the trouble of creating a convincing joker outfit, just to go to the mall or wal-mart, why not raise the bar a little? If you’re going to put so much effort into a costume, go to the mall dressed up as a true to life sasquatch. Roam around and hide behind shit, eat the plants and grunt a lot. That kicks way more ass if you ask me.